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I Am Fez....

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(no subject) [Jan. 18th, 2007|06:40 pm]
I Am Fez....
I've decided:I dont want to move backwards i dont want to rewrite anything. Either we move foreward or we just freeze. Freezings actually pretty damn appealing right about now. Freeze and crystalize every moment. savour the sweet, cringe at the sour and spit out the bad like a rotten seed and make them smile on the sidewalk beneath you. I've got no burdens. Really, honestly. I have none. I've got eyes that are always wishing they were panoramic and could scan everything at once, ive got a brain (fried as it may be)and ive got a heart that i trust with all my gut and not the other way around. And yet i bitch and i whine and i close my eyes to find a train of incoherent thoughts and worries speeding by me leading me to insomnia. And you, you carry the weight of the world on your skinny shoulders and you dance. It's beautiful,really.

We're all in dire need of a good laugh. But im not too amused with my melting moments.
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A haircut wont silence me [Dec. 10th, 2006|03:33 pm]
I Am Fez....
[mood |accomplished]
[music |Vultures- John Mayer]

it's not that i dont feel the need to write anymore, because i do. everytime i see something funny, something cute, something romantic, something i hate or wish i had; my hand itches to write it down...but then i snuggle up with my little green book and i start thinking...do i need to write this down? should i actually write it down? is it really that important and when i look back will i actually want to remember this? it's true ladies and gentlemen...i've begun to even edit my memories.

you can only hold out for so long, you can only keep things in your mind for a little while. And then the blurting begins. You see a woman at Starbucks and ramble out the weather, you yell at everyone and you speak just for the sake of speaking again and you screaaam to make up for lost time. I want to scream damnit so im gonna scream. I will scream at little frightened children learning to swim and i will feel no remorse. I will scream at the old woman who is always standing around my street staring me down as i walk home. I'll scream at people i love and people i hate so dont take it to heart: it's just so i know i still have my voice. I wanna live fast and live slow and drink cosmos in uncomfortable chairs and meet my friends for breakfast and be carrie bradshaw. oh, and i want to slap teachers in the face. Im speaking and im speaking the words i want to speak whether i want to remember them or not. And then a simple smirk (its not really that simple) threatens to leave me speechless..im forcing the words out, im remembering every bit, im not editing my memories any more. I'm writing again.
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and i'm never coming down. [Oct. 1st, 2006|07:31 pm]
I Am Fez....
[mood |hopefulhopeful]
[music |hey love- matt york]

we're speeding by so fast it scares me; look out your window now! and soak up everything you see because give it a second and it'll be gone. and thats the way my world keeps turning now and im scrambling,scrmbling and trying to get everything and everyone to just stand still, just for a moment. i want to be able to tell you secrets forever, to confuse you forever, to scare you with a face that scares me and make you laugh when i dont intend to and i want to smile like i am right now for the rest of my life. i want to pick up everyone in overbearing armfuls and carry them with me wherever i go. i want to be constantly sneaking out and sneaking in, drinking not so innocently from coffee mugs in cars i dont recognize forever, and running around barbed wire fences with my real mother and father (dont ever tell me im not yours!) and never doubting the steps i take. i want to stand still in all of this. i want to stand still in the moment with your mouth full of crackers smiling and i wanna freeze..rewind and freeze and play and freeze and play and play and play. but then again i'm moving like there's no tomorrow. i want everything, fuck it im a selfish son of a bitch and im proud of it...im a mooch for this life:) i want to move foreward to a place; to that appealing far away place thats impossible to get into (but you're all still in my arms) i want to move foreward to a place where it's just me and you and then i want to just stand still. stand still and freeze. soak up everything.

won't you just stand a while with me?
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Like A Handprint On My Heart [Sep. 16th, 2006|04:44 pm]
I Am Fez....
[mood |gratefulgrateful]
[music |Slide- GooGoo Dolls]

for 3 days i lived in and out of flashbacks. Flashbacks of the first time i met each person and how much theyve grown and how much i've grown. We're older...we're wiser(?) But the hearts the same. The people i fell in love with way back i am still falling in love with, the friendships i've made ill treasure forever and the chances we took i still stand by. You've given me a hell of a lot of memories and because of those i love you and because i love you i thank you.

Here's to the 4 years filled with sunrises and sunsets, muffins, dirty socks, dancing friends, sexy back, eagles nest, war paint, blow up hyde, cigar smoke, burnt marshmellows, campfires, the rock, new and broken benches, cereal in hot chocolate, boardwalks, pen arguments, the stupid tally, rain, summercircle, fighting and (winning?), tears, i never, hugs, sleeptalkers and walkers, all nighters, jackets, zodiac discussions,drums,tackles, smiles and laughter and indescribable beauty. Saying goodbye and not being afraid to steal a last look back.

Here's to the 4 years in which i found my family. I love you i thank you and baby it ain't over.
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It's all the same you know [Sep. 1st, 2006|11:25 pm]
I Am Fez....
[mood |happyhappy]
[music |Billy - James Blunt]

she's got a smile on her face and a great taste on her lips and they've been fixed there since the day she said goodbye. sweet sweet sweet summer and she smiled and laughed and crazied her way through. each day filled to the limit with jokes she doesnt get, mountains to secretly climb, lifeguards to blatantly stare at and her nights have been dizzy(?) with cars to sleep in, people to laugh with, and stillettos to sneak out in. she's got you pumped yet confused but shes willing and eager and saving the world one cup of lemon tea at a time. screw the tv show, screw the published book shes got a catch line and she'll be damned if it doesnt take her through the year.

Goodbyes aren't always such a bad thing you know....

Hello's are even better.
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CIAAOOOOOOOOOOOO!!!!! [Aug. 5th, 2006|01:39 am]
I Am Fez....
tonitgh was gooooood.

tomorow i will feele liken shit.

but i love you alll and i sey hello to briaanna! welcome back! i love you! i send my love from CAL FRIGGEN GARY!
ill be back soon, promise
please dont forget me while im gone, and try to stay safe and i will fed ex back some cowboys, or soemthing... whatever...thanks natalie!!<333

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room 557 [Jul. 23rd, 2006|10:55 am]
I Am Fez....
[mood |amusedamused]
[music |Chili Peppers- Snow]

summer school is not taking over my life. summer school is nooottt taaking over my life.

what is taking up my life ( and very beautifuly so) are earl gray tea-if its too much milk i will just throw it out tal so you might as well drink it, friends who might as well live with me, dreams of becoming a pirate, watching pirates repeatedly, the many adventures of kelso and fez and the astro van, the incredible feeling of not giving a shit, dinner and drinks with a t.a who made my life, and the type of dreams that you wake up from thinking, damnit kiran...for once just keep dreaming.

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SUMMMMERRRRR!!!! [Jun. 26th, 2006|03:38 pm]
I Am Fez....
[mood |ecstaticecstatic]
[music |animal bar- chili peppers]

it may have come 3 days later for me then the rest of you but MY SUMMER HAS OFFICIALLY BEGUN. if i have learned anything this year it is that i will never ever EVER be an accountant. good day.

in other news..the raccoons are still in my attic, and now my yoda lightsaber sleeps beside me so i can give the roof a good wack in the middle of the night when they get too rowdy.

..........and christiano ronaldo looks beautiful, even if he's crying. and anyone who says otherwise is just jealous and should go cry in a dump (ahem nick)
goooo portugal??!!
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but i see you with someone with blonde hairy legs(the nice kind) and flip flops.... [May. 13th, 2006|11:03 pm]
I Am Fez....
[mood |frustratedfrustrated]
[music |Arctic Monkeys- Dancing Shoes]

livejournal's been incredibly lame uneventful and if it continues i will have to make the permanent switch to *gasp* ...myspace. oh it is every teens worst nightmare..the place where posting pictures is the easiest shit in the world and there is no log in log out log in log outlog ininn..
hahaha ANYWAYS.
may is officially the craziest month of all time. frustrating rehearsals, staying up till 3 am to finish certain assigments for certain teachers who should strongly consider shoving their phds up their ass! (yes she said it, shes hiding behind typed words but she said it, eff you!) a thesis, statements of purpose, balancing ledger accounts, ..most people when faced with a fuck load of work get their acts together. Kiran? She skips english for salmon salad, and friends that make her laugh and elderflower and endless john mayer. i cant decide whether i'm relieved or upset or in like or just annngrrry with you. im confused, give me a day or so to think it through then maybe ill sneak out my window and we'll pretend nothing went wrong like we usually do.
i neeeeeed new york right now.
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they didnt need matchmaker after all [Apr. 8th, 2006|11:51 am]
I Am Fez....
[mood |amusedamused]

remember francis? i mentioned him a while ago...my math tutor...who im convinced has a crush on my piano teacher cause he always checks himself out in any reflection when shes around....yea him..
theyre going to orlando together for the easter break.
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